rollercoaster weekend

it's been such a up and down weekend. sigh. i can't even remember what i did. when was the last time that i wrote on this thing.
man, one thing that i learnt is that there is absolutely no point in putting your trust and dreams and basing your happiness on people. cuz you just won't get it. neither will you get happiness on on what happens, cuz that don't last long either. only God and him alone.

Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Saviour and my God.
psalm 42 v 11

friday
didn't sleep well cuz mum and dad had come back so late and as a consequence didn't sleep properly, which strangely enough affected the whole of my day. literally. had a day off ARKH, but had to go to a day's training with Sainsbury's. it was interesting to say the least. spent the day with some of my lively workmates. ...a bit crazy when they started to walk down quiet analaby barking like dogs or squarking like birds. anyways, didn't feel like going to fellowship so stayed at home till 7.30pm. just didn't want to talk to people. it ended up ok. God always breaks through.

saturday
had a pretty good day at work. mucked around. it was dead busy cuz it was the ball and it was sunny! none stop for the whole shift. kaylee and me arranged to go salsa dancing with JP on tuesday. it's gunna be interesting to say the least....haha....
anyways, got home to find a nightmare situation. sigh. punishment for having a good day? i dunno. so not happy, but i guess thats life. wish i had somewhere to run and hide to, but i didn't. watched the final to 'Britain's got talent' to soothe my sorrows.

sunday
the day started off bad cuz i didn't get up very early. had to pick up amos and vicky to go to new life. made it and i was glad i did. i'm not a very big fan of special services to be honest. but it spoke to me. Jarrod Cooper is such an inspirational speaker. i need to move on, not to be afraid of change, think big. no bad nostalgia...just looking forwards. all a bit too relevant to me at the moment with work and chucking loads of things out.
it was my turn to lead the youth. i'm really no good at it. but God was good. we discussed and chatted. it's wonderful to see the youth grow and really grasp hold of the faith for themselves. God really is doing something with this preciuos group of people.
i'm at a strange time in my life. i just don't feel part of a group at church. got a bit upset cuz people left, or hung out in groups and i was noone. disappeared in my car for a little while. came back out and was still alone. sigh. played a little badminton which i can reluctantly say that i quite enjoyed. why, oh why do i have this thing where i don't actually let myself enjoy anything? anyways, the evening was devoted to the leaving party for some of the students. it was good. the highlight was that vicky openly confessed that she is now a Christian...whoohoo....heaven is really having a party. God does answer prayer. another thing is the youth. they are absolutly amazing. they are so talented in music and enthusiastic about God. I hope that they never ever lose it.
why is church just so full of sinners? mum was so upset. what can i do about it? Lord, how can you work amongst us? where is the hope?